7 Important things I learned by 19
- Apr 21, 2019
- 4 min read
My months are finally numbered, and I am reaching the big 20 in three months. Yikes. I have managed to live two decades on this earth. I thank God everyday for giving be the strength and motivation to do and be a better person. As I am approaching into adulthood and leaving my teens for good. I have been able to learn so much about myself. The good, bad and evil. Life has not always been exactly fair to me, but I am never complain, because it has shaped me into who I am today. A strong, opinionated independent individual. So going back to the main topic theses are 19 things I have learned by 19
1. To be unapologetically myself
All my life I have always wanted to be someone or something else. I was never quite happy with who I was. I used to often try to be other people my imitating how they walk or dressed. I my mom bought me a cute pair of shoes which I loved so much I would not wear it because of the fear of what people might say. I would try and chemically straighten my hair or hide behind extensions because I hated my nappy 4c hair. I realized that I was putting so much effort into trying to be somebody else when all along I could just focus on being myself. Surely it would take the pressure off. When I entered college I put in my mind that I would no longer be a follow, but instead try to be the very best version of myself. Let me tell you it has been going great to far.
2. Pain is temporary
Since the beginning of time I have faced so many heartbreaks. From friends, family and loved ones. I am here to testify that when you feel your life is over and you might think the world might be coming to and end.....trust me it is not.That boy who you like who doesn't like you back doesn't mean it is over.The good thing about pain whether it be physical or mental is that it goes away. When I had a crush on a guy who did not like me back...yes it hurt and I thought my life could not move on without him. Guess what? it did. When I suffered a 2nd degree burn and I thought I would forever be in pain. Guess what? I'm not in pain anymore! I had to learn this concept the hard way, but the good thing is that I learned it. So whatever you are going through whether it be minor or major trust me when I tell you this...YOU WILL SURVIVE!
3. Live in the present...
Because the future will soon come. As a young girl I always dreamed of getting older. I thought my life would be better and I will have the freedom to do what I desired. Well here I am 19 year old me living what I thought would be a perfect life when I was 14. Instead of trying to go up fast I wished I had enjoyed the moments and created experiences as a child. Yes, I know I am still a child, but the experiences I create now impact my life 10x more. Word of advice? Don't try to grow up instead make mistakes and learn from them.
4. Don't let people project their fears unto you
As someone who's parents are immigrants there is always a certain expectation. Go to college major in something that will make you money fast and you will be successful. That is the only way. My mom for several years projected her fears on me. Though she did have good intentions she did not realize how he fears were impacting my life in a negative way. I was stuck between should I study my passion or somebody else's passion? In Jay Z's motivational talk "5 Minutes For The NEXT 50 Years of YOUR LIFE" he starts of with there are two things that will get you through life "patience and persistence." To me that is a secret ingredient to life. Just because my mom did not reach her goals doesn't mean I won't. With all respect if there is some you want to do and you have the passion go for it!
5. Create memories
In February I reached a stage in my life where I wanted to be alone. I isolated myself from my friends, family and took classes to occupy myself. Now that we are in April and school is over I regret not spending time with people. Because I was having a difficult time I isolated myself. Now that school is done I am trying to make up for lost time. You only do undergrad once. Make sure you create memories. Become outgoing. Participate in everything. Make friends. And...Take pictures.
6. Always be kind to others
When I was younger I moved to America from Ghana. In the new school I went to it was very difficult. Kids were mean and I promised myself to never be like them. Everyone I meet no matter who they are I always try my best to be kind
. It doesn't cost you anything. Kindness leaves an impact on others and make you feel good. In all walks of life remember to stay kind and humble. Don't let people take advantage of you, but be kind.
7. If you want to do something...DO IT!
This explains itself. Live for you. If people laugh who cares. I can't explain the amount of opportunities I have missed out on because I was scared of what people would say. Again...Live for you, and no one else
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